“I have decided to vote for The Khan.” “You have repeatedly told me you are a swing voter but what made you change your mind? Oh wait is it the caretaker Punjab chief minister…”
“No of course not. We are politically highly polarized and so to expect that anyone would be non-partisan is at best naïve and at worst downright stupid.”
“But the Election Commissioner of Pakistan, who was subjected to almost daily abuse by The Khan and his team, has the mandate to be non-partisan and…”
“I reckon we in the Land of the Pure understand the difference between letter and spirit. Has the President taken non-partisan decisions?”
“Well the President is a dentist, that makes him a technocrat, but it is just not relevant in the position he occupies right now.”
“Let me give you another example - the State Bank Governor has qualifications that are relevant to the position he holds and when asked why he isn’t making the exchange rate more flexible he…”
“Responded like an accountant?”
“Well like one accountant we all know - anyway he argued that the open market rate is entirely speculative and the interbank rate isn’t and once the IMF restores the package….”
“It ain’t gonna come down by Rs 50 rupees Mr Governor – at best by 15 to 20 rupees. Besides it’s a chicken and egg thing isn’t it. The IMF isn’t likely to withdraw this prior condition….”
“Perhaps our economic team leaders may convince the Fund that they would de-control the exchange rate as soon as the tranche is released which would release pledged loans from friendly countries…”
“By the way that is singular not plural.”
“Are you crazy we have three friendly countries…”
“No I meant there is only one economic team leader, singular.”
“Oh right anyway why have you decided to vote for The Khan? I mean we talked yesterday and you were adamant that you won’t vote for The Khan. So what changed?”
“Did you hear his Monday speech?”
“Yes I did but it was same o same o.”
“Did you note his pinky.”
“No Pinky Pirni observes purdah and has never…”
“The Khan’s pinky silly.”
“Yes, yes, I understand and as I said…”
“Not Pinky Pirni, The Khan’s pinky was bare — no ugly light green ring.”
“So?”
“I reckon the supernatural hold on him has loosened and I will vote for The Khan.”
Copyright Business Recorder, 2023
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