PARTLY FACETIOUS: How did the FIA officials die?

“I want the Supreme Court to take suo motu notice of the death of a very dear friend.”

“Who is your friend?”

“Excuse me?”

“You have to name him…”

“Hey this is a country where naming and shaming doesn’t really work! Remember publishing the tax paid by parliamentarians, remember the Panama list, remember the increase in assets when in government…”

“Hey, Toshakhana gifts are for whoever is gifted whatever and if the designated amount…”

“I wasn’t referring to the toshakhana but to some cabinet members of the previous government whose assets have risen by more than 100 percent since August 2018…”

“Hey that’s cause the large scale manufacturing sector (LSM) is rising, still rising and…”

“While the rest of the economy is in doldrums…speaking of the LSM sector haven’t heard from Khusro Bakhtiar in a while…”

“He is in Dubai I reckon.”

“Why?”

“He needed some investment advice from Hafeez Sheikh.”

“He should go to Dar…I mean didn’t Dar claim he received more than a million dollars a month from the UAE Sheikh as his economic advisor…”

“Ha ha, but you know Dar’s two employers have been very generous and left him a millionaire many times over — the first employer Nawaz Sharif and the second the UAE Sheikh who pays his employees in cash.”

“Don’t be facetious anyway going to your friend who died…”

“Yep I want suo motu action…”

“He was murdered by a member of the elite?”

“He died of kidney failure.”

“Why doesn’t his family take the doctor to court for malpractice?”

“No he died at home.”

“Are you crazy?”

“Shouldn’t there be the same law for all.”

“Where are you going with that?”

“The Khan wants suo motu for the death of two FIA officials who were investigating Shehbaz Sharif and his son.”

“How did they die?”

“Heart attack, but you know a heart attack can be brought on by ingesting…”

“Hmmm, that would require a dedicated suo motu court of law with branches all over the country to look into…”

“Indeed.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2022