PARTLY FACETIOUS: Swinging yorker or swinging voter?

“I am a swing voter and…”

“Isn’t that against the spirit of…”

“Don’t bring religion into it.”

“Hey, why don’t you learn to let me complete my sentence and then make an observation”.

“Observations can come at any time from any stakeholder, and...why are you laughing?”

“No one can, even remotely, consider you a stakeholder.”

“For your information, there are macro stakeholders and there are micro stakeholders.”

“Nah, you ain’t even a micro stakeholder – in the land of the Pure the macro may have the power and the micros have the trappings of power – and to be honest you don’t belong to either category.”

“How about a micrometer or a nanometer?”

“You can rant and rave about no jobs, eroding ability to pay for your kitchen budget leave all other costs including school fees but do you ever get the feeling that anyone is listening.”

“Hmmm I guess the proof in your pudding is the revolving finance ministers, including the incumbent caretaker, irrespective of the damage they continue to be brought back…”

“Right anyway, I reckon perhaps we are yoctostakeholders - a trillion trillionth.”

“OK, I concede any way when I said I am a swing voter I was referring to the large number of us yoctos who vote on the basis of performance and not on the basis of a deep love for any party leader…”

“A leader who is a micro-stakeholder, right?”

“Put that way, it takes away the power of my vote.”

“Indeed, and this is why the micro category individual humbly requests the macro category institutions to respect the vote cast and…”

“But does request have relevance for the swing voters who are as per your definition are a bunch of yoctos?”

“Nah, but it does send a message to the people of this country, to the world, to the…”

“Gotcha.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2024