PARTLY FACETIOUS: A ‘drone strike’?

“So is that the drone strike by The Khan that Sheikh Rashid warned of?”

“From where I am sitting it wasn’t a drone strike on the general public — 10 rupees per litre reduction in the price of petrol till the budget and 5 rupees in electricity per unit, 2000 rupees additional per Benazir Income Support Programme beneficiary as monthly cash disbursement…”

“Right, and who will pay for all this?”

“It will be funded from our tax money…”

“But tax money is not even enough to meet the current expenditure so I guess more borrowing and would someone please inform The Khan’s economic team that heavy borrowing, heaviest in our history, also contributes to inflation and…and wait…besides prices of all other items are downward sticky and upwardly mobile as it were.”

“Hmmm, just like many of our influentials in all sectors — however high up they are located in terms of assets they remain upwardly mobile…”

“Which is good as The Khan says which means more wealth and…”

“Hmmm, the trickle-down effect is no longer all that valid in economic theory you know. Anyway The Khan also lifted all foreign exchange restrictions, and announced yet another amnesty scheme for industry – hey is that the third or fourth amnesty scheme and I reckon the seventh Fund disbursement ain’t coming in and the Financial Action Task Force will keep us on the grey list and……”

“Does The Khan realize that the foreign exchange freedom for inward or outward movement was how the Sharifs took the money out for those Avenfield flats and the trust fund?”

“Who cares! Anyway as The Khan rightly said if social media does not refrain from targeting the Prime Minister then can one imagine what ordinary people like you and me…”

“Excuse me, but here I disagree with him. I mean as the Prime Minister, like other prime ministers around the world, he is much more, not less, of a target. And respect and love are earned by politicians not…”

“But what about attacks against his wife? Is that fair?”

“No, it isn’t, I agree but then as the country’s Second Lady…”

“Second, she is the First. That’s fake news – off you go to jail for five years…”

“The First Lady technically is the President’s wife.”

“So how do we change that! Would an ordinance do?”

“Don’t be facetious.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2022