PARTLY FACETIOUS: ‘Speed, my friend, has become more important than meeting safety regulations’
“I have it on very good authority….”
“Your authority reminds me of that funny proverb – when in doubt, blame someone else. That’s the secret of authority.”
“My authority is impeccable, I will have you know.”
“The more impeccable it is, the more it operates like an author – you know when you read what you think you have written rather than what is actually on paper.”
“Hmmm but anyway going back to what I began by saying I have it on good authority that The Brown Pope didn’t express his condolences on the death of Pope Francis because he was busy instructing construction workers to complete an underpass in 35 days I think.”
“Ooops, I hope that doesn’t mean a collapse like the Stadium the Brown Pope had built before the…”
“Speed, my friend, has become more important than meeting safety regulations – anyway, that reminds me – I have figured out what angers our Chief Minister of Punjab about the Brown Pope.”
“We all know that he encroaches…”
“You are so very, very, wrong.”
“Because she is more eye candy than…”
“Well, I am not sure whether on a scale of 1 to 10 he even features on the eye candy index.”
“I know she is being accused by the large number of followers of The Man Who Must Remain Nameless and Faceless that she is responsible for not allowing family, lawyers and other visitors to see him and that’s all down…”
“Technically, Adiala jail comes under…”
“Hey we may be trying to emulate China’s growth model but seriously we are a long way away from talking technical.”
“Notwithstanding e-governance and digitisation of everything that would miraculously improve the way we do things here.”
“I am a big fan of Pablo Picasso.”
“He was a painter of great note; but I don’t see…”
“A computer is technical right, Picasso said computers are useless. They can only give you answers.”
“Right, and we don’t want answers?”
“No we don’t, we reckon we have all the answers.”
“Are you being facetious?”
Copyright Business Recorder, 2025
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