PARTLY FACETIOUS: Zardari’s initial training was on the streets

“You say tomato a la American style and I say tomaato a la British style.”

“Frankly I don’t care two hoots about tomatoes, find them squishy, and yes I know they are squishy only in salads but I don’t like the taste and the feel and in human terms I guess a tomato to me is not a smooth talking person.”

“Well you have a lot in common with Maryam Nawaz – she is a sucker for smooth talkers…”

“I take strong exception to it, if she was a sucker for smooth talkers then she would not have married the least smooth talking person in Pakistan.”

“Just pray that events don’t transform the least smooth talking person into the political driving seat…”

“Hey back off, Zardari sahib’s initial training was on the streets and need I add, he developed street smarts which are standing him in very good stead in our politics but the poor Captain’s training was to follow orders and…”

“Ha, ha, ha, and he continues to follow orders to this day. Anyway going back to his wife I would have you know that notwithstanding her inability to understand the power dynamics in Pakistan she does understand the power dynamics in PML-N and whenever she makes a mistake a head in the PML-N falls.”

“Parveen Rashid fell with a bang, and now that the PML-N has no government office to take back severe reprimands are tendered by daddy and I heard Shahid Khaqan Abbasi was told off for sending a show cause notice to the PPP which led to his retraction that it was not a show cause notice – he said it was merely a notice……”

“Indeed, but Abbasi has since re-convinced daddy that the best way forward is to take one step backward – the backward step being to put the PPP on notice that the PML-N is very displeased…and wait before you say anything get that dratted key board changed.”

“OK, OK, so what’s up now?”

“The containers are up in Islamabad, the government is second time around negotiating with a banned outfit banned a week ago on the 15 of April 2021…”

“Move on my friend this is just the first one.”

“First what?”

“First mishandling by the Interior Minister, I mean all other ministers are onto their fourth or fifth mishandlings and…”

“Give him time, he only assumed office on 11 December 2020, as minister of railways, Sheikh Rashid holds the record for the highest number of accidents ever…”

“More than Sarwar sahib who as Aviation Minister pushed the PIA over the precipice….”

“As I said I have faith in the Sheikh – give him time.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2021