PARTLY FACETIOUS: Drawing parallels between Maryam and Ivanka

“What do The Maulana and Former First Daughter (FFD) have in common?”

“I don’t like you to refer to her as the Former First Daughter…”

“But that’s accurate isn’t it… OK, wait before you take umbrage how is Ivanka Trump referred to in the US media today?”

“Well she is not referred to at all.”

“That’s not true, google her name and you will see her photographs at the beach, you will see her with her children and husband…fetching pictures - she is a former model after all, our FFD is not…”

“Hey this is the Islamic Republic – we don’t go to the beach in beach wear where we can be photographed… But to the best of my knowledge Ivanka is no longer referred to as FFD.”

“No she isn’t, but in our babu culture we like to cling on to the previous position if we think it is lower than the current one…you know retired ambassadors want to be referred to as ambassadors still and so on…”

“But our FFD was never a babu…”

“Hey what’s the female of babu?”

“It isn’t bubbly…I guess it’s a gender neutral word.”

“OK, so what do The Maulana and FFD have in common?”

“FFD is much more of an eye candy than The Maulana notwithstanding his flowing beard that I like…”

“Don’t go there.”

“OK, they are both unelected – one was allowed to stand but lost and the other was not allowed to stand and gained the party vice-presidentship…”

“That’s more of a difference than a similarity. And that brings me to their commonality: they are unelected yet are making decisions for their party members who have been elected to parliament – provincial and national…you know whether to resign or not to resign…”

“I thought daddy was taking all the decisions.”

“Maybe, but courtesy the ban on him appearing in our media she is the face of PML-N today!”

“Hmmmm, maybe the powers that be need to revisit…”

“It’s not that I loved Caesar less but that I loved Rome more…”

“Where does Shakespeare come in?”

“It’s not as if The Khan hates her less but that he hates daddy more.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2021