PARTLY FACETIOUS: ‘Lions do not hibernate’

“I take strong exception to the army…”

“Hush, hush, that is

not a…”

“Why don’t you let me finish a sentence, for Pete’s sake? I was going to say that I take strong exception to the army of sycophants deployed by the party leaders to defend them against charges that they could not possibly be privy to.”

“Alexander the Great said I am not afraid of an army of lions led by a sheep, I am afraid of an army of sheep led by a lion.”

“The only lion on our political horizon is hibernating these days…”

“Lions do not hibernate; besides he has been seen around tandoors and in hospitals accompanied by…”

“When I said hibernating, I meant visiting his estates that he was deprived of visiting by the Man Who Must Remain Nameless and Faceless.”

“Avenfield is one of his estates, I mean there was no denial…”

“I take strong exception to the army of sycophants that our party leaders let loose on our airwaves every day defending their asset acquisition strategies….why are you laughing?”

“Asset acquisition strategies indeed! I mean, each has followed his own path to untold wealth – one may have used statutory regulatory orders to evade import taxes, another may use benami accounts, still another may sell state gifts…”

“There is a difference between what is morally not right and a criminal…”

“Somethings’ must give.”

“What?”

“Our national political parties have an army of lawyers who defend them when they are out of power and face serious charges.”

“Right and that is a given – notwithstanding one page, two page, no page, not even the same book.”

“Right I reckon the Peoples Party figured the need to bestow largesse on the lawyers, largesse defined as getting cabinet positions, a long time ago and has a bunch of lawyers who fight the Zardari cases pro bono, the Sharifs did not understand this basic rule of Pakistani politics and paid heavy fees to defend…”

“And heavy fees notwithstanding their rather ill-advised public statements undermined their own cases.”

“Indeed, The Man Who Must remain Nameless and Faceless went a step further and…”

“Yes, that was good strategy, but you know when the wind is not blowing in your favour…”

“Catherine the Great said the wind is blowing and that gives you either imagination or a headache.”

“Ah, the Empress of Russia…but Russia today has no emperors.”

“And that my friend will be our fate as well.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2024