PARTLY FACETIOUS: The old Diana Ross song

“U-turns maybe the mark of a great leader…”

“Well, I reckon The Khan was referring to flexibility as a key ingredient for taking informed decisions — I mean things change constantly right? Nothing remains the same and…why are you laughing?”

“How a logical argument can be used to support an inherently illogical claim.”

“Agreed, but the individual charged with the responsibility of ensuring that an inherently illogical claim is supported by impeccable logic must be someone…someone…”

“Someone other than the Fish…you know people say that a couple living together for a long period of time begin to look like each other because of similar expressions etc. and as the Fish is gaining weight he is looking more and more Malaysian…”

“Did he actually graduate from there?”

“One way to find out…speak to him in Malaysian and I say that because all graduates from the University he claims to have graduated from must know Malaysian…”

“Well I have a Malaysian friend who spoke to him in Malaysian and the Fish spouted his usual: bad mouthed the Zardaris and the Sharifs, praised The Khan to high heaven and…”

“OK, but was it in Malaysian or Urdu?”

“My friend suffered a severe case of vertigo after his encounter and has no memory of the language the Fish used.”

“Ha ha, indeed; anyway when I referred to u turns being the mark of a great leader I was not referring to u turns in one’s mindset, but rather a U-turn in one’s fortunes. I mean I know The Khan is…”

“Danger Man inside out…reminds me of the old Diana Ross song — inside out boy you turn me.”

“Ah but she doesn’t say boy you ‘u’ turn me.”

“Don’t be facetious, anyway does The Khan realize that on the day the vote of no confidence is voted upon and supposing he loses…”

“Not happening, he is going to win the vote and be with us till 2028 and…”

“Listen please listen…”

“Have you noted his body language?”

“Right, all those in Pakistani private channels took a crash course on body language from the University of…”

“Malaysia?”

“Don’t be facetious, anyway everyone is talking of body language ignoring that neither side can show nerves for that would mean existing supporters will queue up to go to the other side…”

“Hmmm, queuing is not a national pastime…”

“OK scrambling anyway The Khan must be aware that if the vote of no confidence succeeds he will not have the helicopter or the ten to fifteen cars to drop him home.”

“If foresight was a characteristic of our leaders…”

“Pigs would fly.”

“Indeed.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2022