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"In a special audit of the first two editions of the Pakistan Super League, the Auditor General of Pakistan pointed out massive irregularities."
"That would be which year?"
"2017-18 and need I add, The Man Who Shall Remain Nameless was at the helm of the Board - a man who our Prime Minister does not like."
"That's putting it mildly so has anyone informed The Khan yet about the irregularities in PCB Board during the tenure of the Man Who Shall Remain Nameless?"
"I don't think so, The Khan is busy with other matters - there are the Indian atrocities in Kashmir, then there is the economic meltdown that continues in spite of the economic team patting themselves on the back whenever they see a camera, and if things were not bad enough the earthquake on Tuesday has devastated roads and made reaching those in need more difficult..."
"You know there is a tiny road in Blue Area that connects the Nadra Chowk to Attaturk Avenue that the Nawaz Sharif government began to expand due to heavy traffic and lo and behold more than a year later it is still not made due to differences between Iesco and the CDA causing massive traffic jams in the Blue Area..."
"You can't blame The Khan he doesn't know - his route is through the Diplomatic Enclave so unless his driver makes a slight detour he isn't going to know."
"And a detour would cost the exchequer thousands more because more petrol would be used by his convoy."
"OK I guess then the best way forward is to get Iesco and CDA to begin negotiations and..."
"Reports indicate that they are in negotiations for the past year or so..."
"They obviously don't have good negotiators. The only two men that I know for a fact who have negotiated recently and signed on the dotted line are Hafeez Sheikh and Reza Baqir. So I formally request them to step forward in the national interest, and..."
"Don't be facetious. If Iesco is involved then why doesn't Umar Ayub negotiate?"
"Umar Ayub's negotiating skills are unknown and..."
"Hey, anyone who has been a federal minister under two different administrations is a good negotiator."
"I guess you are right."

Copyright Business Recorder, 2019

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