PARTLY FACETIOUS: The second bride of Junaid Safdar less pretty than his mum

“Why don’t we try the Trump model?”

“You mean initiate criminal charges against Governor State Bank of Pakistan Jamil Ahmed to de-seat him for keeping the discount rate double the regional average and…”“Dint be silly, Ahmed doesn’t control such measures, He is simply following the International Monetary Fund’s directives as did his predecessors…hang on, I think I know why you want him out – just because the Deputy Prime Minister appointed him in his preferred avatar, as finance minister…”

“Back the hell off the guy! From where I am sitting a DPM is a much higher portfolio than an FM.”

“FM as in finance or FM as in Foreign…”

“OK I grant you he wants to retain the F before the portfolio and is there any other portfolio that starts with an F by the way?”

“Can’t think of another, unless of course they decide to create a new ministry – how about a Ministry that deals exclusively with the Faceless?”

“Don’t be facetious anyway, the Trump model that I want to follow has nothing to do with the governor of the state bank or DPM.”

“Speaking of the Sharifs, the second bride of Junaid Safdar was less pretty than his mum, like his first bride. By the way, where was his dad?”

“Back off, it was a family affair, anyway that reminds me President Trump did follow Nawaz Sharif’s trailblazing decisions – the First Daughter, empowering those related to him by marriage of his children….”

“Nope, not that either. President Trump wants Greenland to become a part of the US – and has threatened tariffs against the Europeans…”

“Yeah, but the Europeans have sent troops to Greenland and flown a bunch of high-tech fighter jets, which has angered the President…”

“Well, the eight offending countries have sent less than I think 100 troops to Greenland and I just saw two planes circling in the sky…”

“Did the Europeans display the two bobsleds?”

“Don’t be facetious, what I was referring to is why don’t we offer to buy Kashmir from India…”

“With what? Ask the IMF to give us more cash…”

“NO, no, we can threaten India with Chinese fighter jets and…”

“That was a big win for us yes and yes we have one superpower win our camp, but I would advise the stakeholders to focus on re-energizing the Indus Water Treaty cause if Modi does not change…”

“Right, right, yeah, we need to focus on that first!”

“Priorities, my friend priorities – you cannot deny that President Trump is supporting achievable priorities…”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2026