PARTLY FACETIOUS: The trend in this country is not to invest in Pakistan but outside

“Trump dished the French President.”

“Dished? Like what? As in barbecue, curry?”

“Or pizza – Nawaz Sharif does like pizza doesn’t he?”

“I am not sure it’s the pizza that he likes, I reckon he likes the location - Harrods in London.”

“Location should be more important to Trump – he is a real estate tycoon though recently he has been involved in all sorts of business – cryptocurrency has reaped billions for his family, billions mind you not millions like…like…”

“Foreign direct investment inflows?”

“Shut up.”

“Hear me out – the billions Trump family has raked in due to his easing oversight of the cryptocurrency industry yet there are serious ethical and legal questions…”

“I would advise you to shut up and don’t try to put up because there is nothing that you can put up.”

“Well my argument…”

“Shut the hell up. Moving forward the Trump family is also selling some items like gold mobile phones which incidentally are a steal at less than 500 dollars…”

“Why can’t our prime and chief ministers engage in business ventures, you know invest their own money in the private sector, provide jobs to people and…and wait…generate growth…”

“Two things first of all take away chief ministers from this plan because other than the Punjab chief minister who belongs to the ruling family the others are second to third tier leaders.”

“OK but…”

“Wait and second the trend in this country is not to invest in Pakistan but outside – and that too mostly in real estate.”

“But…”

“And look at the glass as fully full, because the FDI that is coming into the country is not facing any ethical and legal issues…”

“That is because thankfully all are on the same page and that’s the way the cookie must crumble. Poor Trump is facing pressure from everyone – the Israelis, the Arabs who have pledged billions of dollars of investment in the US, his own MAGA base and last but not least his own cabinet…”

“I propose Trump changes the constitution to get a third term, and we have lawyers with the experience and…”

“Oh shut up.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2025