PARTLY FACETIOUS: Some crude binaries

“Babar Awan has been coming on television a lot.”

“That’s Dr for you, yes I am aware of the Montecito angle but with Meghan and Prince Harry now resident there that place has taken on credibility that…”

“Shush, don’t be facetious, anyway I hear every time Babar Awan comes on television Zardari sahib, the king of reconciliation….”

“Second sons, and husbands who inherit never become kings – see Prince Harry is never going to be king and his older brother, the first son, by producing so many children is pushing him and his children way down in the line of succession.”

“Whatever Zardari sahib says goes so in my book he is king.”

“I am not going to talk of your book selection anyway Prince Zardari throws a bottle of honey…”

“Bottle of honey?”

“Remember one of his loyalists - Sharjeel Memon - was unfairly told off for having a bottle of honey in his hospital room which had been declared a sub-jail…”

“Don’t be naughty, anyway Prince Zardari throws a bottle of honey at his television screen whenever Babar Awan comes on television because he is as toxic to Prince Zardari as…as…as…”

“Shehbaz Sharif is to Maryam Nawaz?”

“Don’t be silly, besides unlike these two Babar Awan and Prince Zardari are never ever going to be related by blood or by marriage and…”

“Hey you said the same about Ishaq Dar when he was an accountant and look at him now.”

“That’s true and speaking of Nawaz Sharif what Babar Awan is to Prince Zardari Chaudhary Nisar is to Nawaz Sharif or…wait… I have another example…what the Chaudharys of Gujrat are to Nawaz Sharif…or wait…”

“God that list is exhaustive I am sure but my advice to you: don’t highlight Mian sahib’s list of non-politicians he hates and…”

“Oh Ok, anyway replacing a television is from President Zardari’s petty cash…”

“I have it on good authority that a man who gifted him his house in Lahore writes it off as depreciation and…”

“The same man who paid millions of pounds as penalty to the UK Serious Fraud Office which was remitted to the government of Pakistan and which Shehzad Akbar used to adjust the local penalties…”

“How long has it been since Akbar graced your television screen?”

“Now that you mention it quite a while, that is not usual…you reckon he is in trouble?”

“He is doing a Maryam Nawaz because he shuts up when told to shut up.”

“Hmmmm.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2021