PARTLY FACETIOUS: We in the Subcontinent don’t take preemptive actions

“So the operative word is pre-emptive.”

“What?”

“It’s a good word. It justifies taking an action that does not have merit at the time it is taken.”

“Well, I take asthma medicine to pre-empt an attack. Why are you laughing?”

“In the Land of the Pure, we don’t have the option of preemption.”

“Yes you do, you can pre-empt load shedding by getting a UPS and if you have more cash a generator.”

“And the preemption may not work if load shedding is for more hours than can be accommodated by most UPS’s and running a generator is not cheap. A better preemption would be getting solar panels…”

“No more, net metering is…”

“OK wrong example. Anyway Israel attacked Iran and claimed preemptive action.”

“Wait, let me give you another example. India tried to take preemptive action against Pakistan….”

“Not true. We in the Subcontinent don’t take preemptive actions. India claimed it was taking retaliatory action after accusing Pakistan without any proof of masterminding the Pahalgam terror attack that killed 24 tourists on 21 May.”

“And we retaliated against their how can I say this, unprovoked and unsubstantiated retaliation.”

“Right and we in the Sub-Continent always retaliate never pre-empt even if the retaliation is not substantiated by proof. Now, if India had launched an attack against us before the Pahalgam incident…”

“That would have been stupid.”

“Well, there is a difference – India and Pakistan are nuclear powers with formidable air power and defence systems. No one other than Israel has the air power to carry out mass killing in the neighbourhood– Hamas doesn’t, Mehmud Abbas doesn’t in the West Bank with Israeli settlers taking over land, Hezbollah doesn’t, Syria doesn’t…”

“Houthis…”

“Indeed.”

“So we in the subcontinent say tomato the English way and the Israelis say it the American way - tomaito.”

“So we have to convince the world to cite potato?”

“Sorry?”

“Isn’t potato pronounced the same way in all English speaking countries?”

“Don’t know, don’t care, as neither Israel nor Iran are English speaking countries. And I bet you if you are an Israeli you would pronounce potato with a harsh t while an Iranian would use the soft t.”

“Retaliation or preemption doesn’t matter, my friend – people die, the arms industry makes cash and….”

“That’s the way the cookie is crumbling in our increasingly imperfect world today.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2025