PARTLY FACETIOUS: ‘The cleverly dispersed Bilawal Houses are the White House’

“So where is the Third Wife these days?” “No longer in Adiala.” “I know, but is she being feted at the taxpayers’ expense?”

“Don’t be mean, she is a housewife and…”

“If I recall she has no property in Khyber Pakhtunkhwa, none of her nearly half a dozen children have any property in that province, and neither does The Man Who Must Remain Nameless and Faceless…”

“Ahhh I get you, no I am no longer sure as to where she is but last I heard she had developed a serious allergy to any residence where notifications ruled and while she wanted to go to Lahore, as we all know Notification Maryam Nawaz (NMN)…”

“Correct, so where is daddy? It had been reported that NMN would join him in Avenfield and then the two would proceed to Europe, and then I began hearing reports that he has gone onto the US, so where is he?”

“Two things, first of all I resent the fact that you are equating Avenfield flats with the entire country! I mean, it’s like saying…”

“That Raiwind is our Number ten these days again!”

“Don’t be facetious.”

“And wait…the cleverly dispersed Bilawal Houses are the White House.”

“How come?”

“Well as far as I can see the White House is no longer representative of a sole superpower, we have multipolarity…”

“Right and Bilawal has clearly emerged as a leader in his own right…”

“Hey, NMN is not far behind!”

“She is kinda far behind because she is fixated and claiming elimination of their enemy when there is overwhelming evidence to the contrary.”

“With a few choice aspersions and abuses thrown in!”

“One question: ever since NMN was bestowed the Chief ministership of Punjab, I have not spotted Captain Safdar. I mean, wasn’t he always shouting slogans, OK rather inane and offensive slogans, but he was shouting slogans while being just out of striking distance of his wife and…”

“And then there was a misstep, and he came within striking distance.”

“Oh, you are bad.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2024