“I propose all official cars to be parked and not used till after the oil crisis is past.”
“Parked where?”
“Not in the houses of those they have been allocated to.”
“What about their offices?”
“Nah they may be tempted to use them.”
“We can have the car parks monitored.”
“Hmmm no, then we may need monitors to monitor the monitors.”
“Ad infinitum?”
“Yeah which is I propose that we provide them with bicycles.”
“And what about the line of cars providing them with protocol?”
“They get cycles too.”
“That’s so unsafe – protocol cars are for security. What if a terrorist or an attacker comes on a motorbike or a car and how will the security catch the perpetrator?”
“Get them fast cycles like Specialized S-Works Tarmac SL8, or Trek Madone SLR 9 or Corvelo S5 – they have maximum aerodynamic efficiency and can compete with our rather ageing protocol car speeds.”
“And how much do these cost?”
“Between 12,500 to around 18,000.”
“Rupees?”
“You must be joking.”
“So where is the saving?”
“I didn’t think of that.”
“Perhaps you should enter politics!”
“Don’t be facetious.”
“I suppose we can slash current expenditure.”
“Nah that ain’t happening – heavily reliant as we are on borrowing simply to forestall default current expenditure continues to rise.”
“But…but…”
“Get them on bicycles – at least they will be fit.”
“The protocol staff or the…”
“All.”
Copyright Business Recorder, 2026