PARTLY FACETIOUS: ‘If a degree is a degree be it fake or not then protein is protein’

“A horse, a horse my kingdom for a horse.”

“I would be careful if I were you.”

“How come? I am merely quoting a great writer, William Shakespeare and….”

“You aren’t by chance referring to the possibility of horse-drawn carts becoming the preferred mode of transport in this country given the steep rise in petroleum prices partly due to the international oil market but more due to the petroleum levy and the carbon levy and…”

“Horse or donkey drawn carts right? We have them both.”

“I heard donkey meat was being sold…”

“Well if a degree is a degree be it fake or not then protein is protein be it from snake meat or donkey meat or…”

“Stop right there anyway, start looking at the glass as half full — if by paying less than 3 rupees per litre on petrol our government can get 1.4 billion dollars from the International Monetary Fund…”

“OK but when I quote Shakespeare I wasn’t referring to the price of petrol.”

“If you were referring to the kingdom manager…”

“It’s usually referred to as the executive or the cabinet, but no, I wasn’t referring to any Pakistani national – green card or iqama holder or not. I was referring to the humiliating trade agreement with the US that the European Union President Ursula von der Leyen agreed to. I mean, this is what happens when you have unrepresentative, read unelected….”

“Is this an oblique reference to Forms 45 and 47 because if so…”

“Stop threatening me, and no it isn’t, but von der Leyen’s subsequent press conference undermines, ridicules, under-estimates the education level of the people she purports to represent.”

“So you reckon her kingdom is exchangeable for a horse, now would that be an Arab or a…”

“She recently antagonized the Chinese, verbally attacks the Russians at every chance and then gets humiliated by the US President.”

“Hamm but speaking of iqama did you appreciate the success of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs under the able leadership of the deputy prime minister and the foreign minister in the UAE no longer requiring our officials and diplomatic passport holders to get a visa to enter.”

“But he is supposed to represent 25 crore Pakistanis not the handful of officials!”

“Look at the glass as half full. Now our politicians would not need an iqama to get a visa!”

“Dear Lord.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2025