PARTLY FACETIOUS: The difference between internship and poodleship

“What Tony Blair was to Bush II, Sunak is to Biden?” “What?” “He is enrolled in a course on poodleship.” “What in the world does that mean?”

“You have heard of internship! Monica Lewinsky was an intern of Bill Clinton.”

“I have heard of internship but not poodleship.”

“British prime ministers have perfected the art of poodleship – you wag your tail when Uncle Sam crooks his finger, you do the unnecessary – veto a resolution already vetoed by the US that calls for pauses for humanitarian assistance to reach the Gaza strip…”

“Which finger did Uncle Sam crook this time? The middle finger”?

“Don’t be facetious anyway as you know the US has still not signed a trade deal that the UK wants, US businesses no longer think the UK is an attractive place to invest after Brexit and…”

“Maybe the UK government can consider setting up their version of a Special Investment Facilitation…”

“Shush, anyway the poodleship has stooped such a level that Sunak is off to Israel to express solidarity of his government to the over-dog as opposed to an underdog…”

“I reckon Sunak’s government has many similarities with our caretakers and…”

“Well, Sunak was snubbed brutally by President Xi, our caretaker Prime Minister hasn’t. Sunak is clean shaven while our prime minister sports a…”

“Be serious, Sunak is not going to win the next elections for his party that is in the unlikely event the Conservatives allow him to lead the party into the next elections, he is not in touch with reality as the UK media coverage of the war in the Middle East does not support the Israeli bombing and…”

“Hmmm, is there a cipher from the British Embassy in the US that…”

“Stop it. Anyway Sunak was brought up in the UK- surely he must know that the British public are not like the US public, the ultra-conservative element is very contained in the UK as opposed to the US, British politicians are not like their counterparts in the US, and…”

“Let me correct you. He went to school in the US…”

“I didn’t know.”

“Yes he did that’s where he met his wife.”

“Oh OK that may explain a lot.”

Copyright Business Recorder, 2023