“I have it on good authority that after this Sunday past Mian Nawaz Sharif’s health has taken a turn for the worse.”
“I didn’t hear that!”
“His return has been postponed indefinitely and this is in spite of the heartfelt plea of The Man Who Shall Remain Portfolio-less urging him to return as the only way the party can win at the polls.”
“Well, The Hawk ain’t leaving that seat and as long as he is the Chairman of the Pakistan Cricket Board…”
“You misunderstood — I was not referring to the Man Who Shall Remain Nameless but the Man Who Shall Remain Portfolio-less.”
“I would advise all three major party leaders to rein in the leash a bit — anyway Javed Latif has reached the highest level, 10, in his sycophancy to Nawaz Sharif, the same number in his attacks on Shehbaz Sharif.”
“He is one of those the leadership of this country keeps on a leash! But if you meant Parveen Rashid, he couldn’t clear a hefty bill which is why he couldn’t submit his papers for a Senate seat and…”
“Get that keyboard sorted out my friend, now that the PML-N is in government! Anyway Pervez Rashid is The Trainer and let’s be honest as a trainer his job is not even 20 percent complete – the trainee canvassed in AJK and the party lost, the trainee canvassed in the recent Punjab bye polls and the party lost…”
“The Khan reckons Maryam Nawaz is a closet Khanzadeh; anyway Nawaz Sharif ain’t coming back any time soon, his samdhi, Ishaq Dar, who was going to return by end July has also taken a turn for the worse in terms of health so his return is postponed.”
“Health is wealth I say!”
“Hmmm, in our part of the world the proverb a fool and his wealth are soon parted is more applicable. Take Nawaz Sharif the wise: did his conviction lead to any parting of the ways with his untold wealth? Hell no. Take his daughter the wiser: not a single penny has been credited to the exchequer. Take Ishaq Dar: I am not sure about the status of his house in Lahore but I do know that he wants it back and may succeed if the party remains in power.”
“Right and Zardari sahib has his front men and The Khan has his ATMs.”
“The Khan has lost some ATM cards though I hear there have been replacements.”
“Lost them or they have been stolen in which case he needs to report them to the relevant authorities…”
“Yes he is reporting every single day loud and clear.”
Copyright Business Recorder, 2022
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