“I know the best solution for the problem.”
“If you are referring to the continued violation of the rights of an inmate…”
“No I am used to it by now. The Sisters media talk, the deferral yet again of the launch of a campaign aimed at the release of The Man Who Must Remain Nameless and Faceless…”
“Are you referring to those dratted NATO countries that dare to refuse President Trump’s call to patrol the Strait of Hormuz and thereby ensure the unencumbered movement of oil tankers destined to their own countries!”
“Nah – President Trump knows that the US constitutes almost 90 percent of all NATO troops and more than 90 percent of the funds that are required to run NATO so he can withdraw any time he wants.”
“What will happen to Rutte, The Son, the current chief of NATO who referred to Trump as daddy.”
“Well Trump can leave NATO but he really can’t take the buildings so I reckon Rutte, will have his office, plush office I hear, perhaps that will be enough for him. But that wasn’t the problem to which I have a solution.”
“Well what is it then?”
“President Trump wants a fifty-first state doesn’t he? He has three candidates in mind for that prestigious honour.”
“Our leadership is willing to nominate him for a peace prize again but I am sure they don’t want to be granted the status of a fifty-first state.”
“Hey Machado gave him the medal so that’s water under the bridge. The three contenders for the prestigious honour of being the fifty-first state are Canada, Venezuela and Greenland.”
“What about Cuba?”
“Don’t side track me, what I wanted to say was that these countries are not contiguous to the US and that reminds me of pre-1971 Pakistan – right we had an East and a West.”
“So Canada becomes North Wisconsin, Venezuela South Texas.”
“Greenland?”
“How about rubbing the nose of those dratted Europeans who have refused to participate in the war against Iran: US fifty-one.”
“Don’t be facetious – anyway you know Israel is under considerable attack in the US, especially amongst the less than 40 year olds, though there is widespread support from the Democrats and Republicans today, but that will change with time and …”
“Israel as the fifty-first state! Are you out of your mind! I mean why would Israel cede its sovereignty to…”
“Grant Israel full autonomy and as the fifty-first state who will dare criticize Israel or its actions and the administration can legitimately put people behind bars if anyone dares criticize…”
“Hmmm not a bad idea.”
Copyright Business Recorder, 2026