Partly Facetious: PM speaks to MBS

07 Sep, 2021

"What is so funny?"

"The Khan and MBS, the Crown Prince of Saudi Arabia, talked on the phone and agreed that there must be inclusive government in Afghanistan."

"So?"

"The Khan doesn't like talking to the Opposition, even on matters where the constitution specifically stipulates consultation with the leader of the opposition..."

"But he has inducted a large number of erstwhile opposition members into his government at the federal level and the provincial level and, in The Khan's book that should count."

"Is that the same book which is open on Chapter 11 and all are on the same page..."

"Chapter 11, isn't that the bankruptcy..."

"I don't remember, anyway The Khan doesn't talk to the Opposition cause they are thieves, OK, OK, one notch above, dacoits...well I am sorry I don't know any word that is a notch above....what? Highway robbers! OK but the Taliban were hounded by the previous government, they were incarcerated, they were killed..."

"Don't compare apples and oranges..."

"OK, let's talk about strawberries then...how are the Taliban and members of the previous government going to work together with this very bad history and..."

"The Taliban are showing maturity - I mean I did see Karzai and Abdullah Abdullah talking to the Taliban so..."

"True, anyway I found it funny - you can choose to laugh at your joke."

"You know what I found funny! Shehbaz Sharif appointed Malik Ahmed Khan as his spokesperson; Maryam Nawaz eat your heart out!"

"How come? I mean she has the same spokesperson as daddy who is the head honcho of the party and...and he dictates party policy while Shehbaz Sharif expresses an opinion only..."

"And therein Marriyum Aurangzeb bit the dust...I like her, I reckon she should kind of stop hanging around her namesake because I have heard that she, as in her namesake, has antagonized the powers that be so much that they say never, ever, ever..."

"Wasn't the same thing said about Benazir Bhutto?"

"Maybe, but Benazir won elections, unlike Maryam Nawaz who lost elections in AJK, in Gilgit-Baltistan, in..."

"Rigging!"

"If that were entirely true then I am sure Plan C or D would have been activated by now and it hasn't..."

"Plan C or D? I thought politicians have only Plan A, in power and Plan B trying to come to power - what's this about C and D?

"If you don't know that I would suggest you emigrate and send remittances back and..."

"Dear me, tone down your hostility - we are both Pakistanis."

Copyright Business Recorder, 2021

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