Partly Facetious : Buzdar is not known for his looks

11 Apr, 2019

"You know I have been thinking about this for a while and for the life of me I cannot find in adult or children's literature who the Sindh Chief Minister reminds me of."
"Why would you need..."
"Hey, it is not a matter of need my friend, it's a matter of providing some comic relief to our overburdened lives what with..."
"I get it, but you know the Punjab Chief Minister is not known for his looks or his fitness for that matter so referring to him as Thumbelina who is a petite and beautiful character who fought with the likes of evil spirits to..."
"And that's why I refer to him as Thumbelina - he is trying to retain his position while the evil Pakistan Tehrik-i-Insaaf ideological leadership is trying to usurp his power and..."
"I thought his powers had already been transferred though I have one suggestion for our Thumbelina that would restore his powers."
"What? To stop signing directives issued by another?! That would make him homeless in Lahore in one second."
"No, I don't mean that! Let me ask a question: what is it that The Khan has been obsessive about all his life?"
"He missed a wife whenever he didn't..."
"Hey stop, don't get personal."
"Cricket?"
"Age does catch up with professional players so no not that either."
"OK, I guess The Khan has always been and continues to be obsessive about fitness."
"Viola! Please give Thumbelina this suggestion...get in shape and perhaps The Khan may revisit Thumbelina's capacity to deliver on New Pakistan..."
"That's true; on a scale of one to ten all those around The Khan are kinda fitter than those in previous administrations. Take the current kitchen cabinet - Shah Mehmud, Asad Umar, Khusro Bakhtiar even Azam Khan compared to Fawad Hassan Fawad, the Gullu Butts..."
"You reckon the way to The Khan's heart is through fitness? Need I remind you the Sindh Chief Minister is very fit! Thumbelina sports baby fat on his face and the Sindh Chief Minister features and demeanor remind me of a hawk..."
"A hawk is a predator, has been known to kill snakes and..."
"And has visual acuity and can forecast accurately and..."
"Perhaps The Khan should try to lure him over to his side - visual acuity is sorely missing from his cabinet - take the Finance Minister's optimism not backed even by supporters of The Khan..."
"Don't be facetious."

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