Partly Facetious: Economy is in the doldrums

"Patience is a virtue."

"I agree but patience for how long is the question."

"That is a relative concept."

"Whatever do you mean?"

"When a mum asks her child to be patient as she prepares food I reckon it would be no more than a few minutes. If she makes the child wait for a day, then you may have the makings of a rebellion or a food thief."

"OK but what if..."

"Hang on when you apply for a job you may be told to be patient as the final decision would be made within a week or even a month."

"Not if you are seeking a government job in the Land of the Very Pure. I mean it could range from one year to two years to on occasion even three to four years."

"OK and when The Khan asks Pakistanis to be patient what time is he talking about? And...wait let me finish is he talking about months or...."

"We are in the second month of the second year of his government so months are kind of out."

"OK so what are we talking about and more importantly is his request for patience realistic?"

"The economy is in the doldrums and it will take more than two years I reckon and that is if all goes according to plan but in economics nothing does go according to plan which explains the use of the term certerus paribus, which means everything else remains the same or mutatis mutandis - allowing other things to change accordingly and you and I know that things do not always remain the same or change accordingly."

"Hey these two terms have been made much use of by our economic managers - from Adam to...to Hafeez Sheikh."

"Adam?"

"What's the Muslim equivalent of Adam, the first man...."

"Aaadum!"

"So a difference of accent alone - just like the different faces, some recurring, of the finance ministers we have had. Anyway when I said it applies to our economic managers from Aaadum to Sheikh I meant they all supported the same policies and the result was the same - economic impasse after every four to five years..."

"It's now more than half century of technocrats appointed as finance ministers - belonging to the same school of economics....."

"I do wonder why our decision makers do not hire someone from a different school of economic thought....."

"Be patient."

"It's been over 72 years!"

Copyright Business Recorder, 2019